Commencement from Emerson College – What I Would Have Said

I was nominated to be the student speaker at today’s commencement for the graduate ceremony. While I was not selected (I attend a communications school – the competition was pretty stiff) I figured I could at least share what I wrote on my blog. Special thanks to Anna for nominating me and Chris, Max and Shaun for your thoughtful feedback. 

So, how did you end up at Emerson?

This was a question I feel I was asked fairly often when I first started my academic career here at Emerson College. The answers were simple: I wanted to better myself. I wanted to make more money. I wanted to be more competitive in the job market. I wanted the prestigious Emerson name on my résumé. You know, the basics.

I remember when I opened up my acceptance letter to Emerson (which by the way, said “Congratulations” right on the outside of the envelope – sort of a buzz kill).

I was standing outside of my apartment – a subsidized housing unit in San José, CA where I had been living while I served a second year in AmeriCorps with City Year. City Year is a national non-profit organization that was founded right here in Boston.  Our mission is to keep kids in school and on track by placing young, diverse leaders in urban schools to serve as tutors, mentors, and role models for at-risk students.

As someone who grew up in in a log cabin in the middle of the woods in upstate NY, a place where there were no lines on the roads and where you were more worried about crashing into a deer than into another car, I had been out of my element living in a huge urban city. But I had grown accustomed to living life outside of my comfort zone, and I was thrilled at the prospect of moving to Boston to attend the graduate school of my dreams.

But for those of you sitting before me today, you know that these dreams slowly but surely turned into a hard reality.

After two years out of college, I found myself in a classroom until late into the night at least two nights a week after having worked a full day in my current role as the Social Media Manager at City Year headquarters. My alarm still had to be set on the weekends, as I needed to wake up and complete a variety of assignments and study for exams.

Oftentimes I would lash out on Twitter and Facebook in complete disbelief over how my quality of life had deteriorated so quickly.

While I received a lot of likes from fellow classmates and friends across the country that were in the same predicament as I, one of my mentors posted a comment that forever changed my perspective. It was a link to a story about Malala Yousafazi, a fifteen-year-old girl living in Pakistan who had been shot by the Taliban because she wanted to have access to an education, but was denied that privilege because of her gender.

Here I was COMPLAINING that I was attending a world class college and had to sacrifice a few hours of my precious weekend to take care of some homework, while a world away a young girl was nearly killed simply because she believed that all children deserved to be educated, regardless of gender.

Malala is an inspiration to all of us. I have thought about her many times as I found myself looking at my iPhone to see how much longer until class would finally end, or as I forced myself to roll out of bed early on a Sunday morning to attend to my studies.

When I think about Malala, I also go back to the question: Why Emerson? Before any selection committee opened my application or read my letters of recommendation, I had to choose Emerson. All of us here had to make that choice – many of us, much like myself, without ever setting foot on campus.

I may not be able to explain what drew me to Emerson. A lot of it was they had a really great website, was located in an awesome city, and I knew an alum who had nothing but great things to say about it.

What I can tell you is that I found that many of my personal values are reflected in the culture and community of this College.

One of the best things about Emerson College is its commitment to diversity. In my first class at Emerson I literally felt like I was at a real life model UN. There were students from China, Pakistan, Bermuda, the Congo, Texas… the list goes on. Never in my life have I been exposed to so many different perspectives on life and communication challenges that I knew existed, but never had to experience firsthand.

My professors at Emerson held high expectations for us – and we were held to them. Every paper and project was treated like something that would become a tremendous asset to your portfolio. Every case study we reviewed in class was analyzed from all possible angles. We were pushed to think outside the box and with everything that we did, and this will stay with me through not only the entirety of my professional career, but in my personal relationships.

I also admire and appreciate President Lee Pelton’s vision for civic engagement with the announcement of the Elma Lewis Center for Civic Engagement in his inaugural address. As someone who spent two years of my life serving the community of San José, California, I was filled with pride to know that the spirit of service would now be an integral part of the Emerson community.

For those of you who travelled here for this ceremony and who have not been in Boston over the past six weeks, we have experienced trying times. Seven members of the Emerson College student body were injured in the Boston Marathon Bombings. I myself was cheering at the finish line a mere two hours before the blasts forever changed this city.

I can’t help but think of Richard Martin as I stand here speaking to you today. I can’t help but wonder if any of the children mercilessly slain in the Newtown shootings were destined to one day walk across this very stage or have the opportunity to address their fellow classmates by delivering their commencement speech.

Sadly, these are things the world will never know.

What I do know is that while that potential was lost on us, there are beacons of hope – and I truly believe that much of this hope is sitting right here in this room.

One of my most promising classmates is not here with us today because he went back to Pakistan to vote in an important election. Being guaranteed a (mostly) fair election is something that many of us take for granted. As is the simple act of logging into Facebook to post a photo of what we had for lunch, or going to the doctor when we have the sniffles, or making the important life decision to legally marry the person we love.

As we have experienced even just over the past two years that we have spent at Emerson College, we will be faced with insurmountable problems. But we are a lucky select few, for we are not only Boston Strong – we are Emerson Strong.

So, graduating class of 2013 – I leave you with the words of Malala Yousafzai:

“I don’t mind if I have to sit on the floor at school. All I want is education. And I am afraid of no one.”

As Emerson graduates, we are uniquely positioned to make a positive impact on the world.  We have the education – now let us move forward without fear and work towards building a better world.

Thank you.

What a Day.

Have you ever had a day that you really couldn’t believe just happened? A day where you felt so in awe of people in this world and the humanity that exists all around you?

Today was that kind of day for me.

I started off my morning by interviewing Jeff LaFata, a City Year Boston alumni who has dedicated his career to creating opportunities for people with disabilities. This past year was the pilot year for Empowering People for Inclusive Communities, or as it is better known – EPIC. We had a long conversation about inclusivity and the lack of leadership and service opportunities for young people with disabilities – a void he passionately works to fill. The conversation I had with him was so incredibly inspiring. I can’t wait to publish the post on the City Year blog to highlight his amazing work.

Later in the afternoon, I had the opportunity to hear Richard Blanco, the inaugural poet, deliver the first poem he ever wrote and the inaugural poem. It was so powerful to hear him speak in person about the power of poetry and the importance of the arts in educating America’s youth. I had the chance to sit down and speak with him about his upcoming book and his passion for working with youth – really thankful to have had that opportunity.

This evening I ended up attending the 20th anniversary celebration for Teen Empowerment – honoring both the incredible work of this organization and the dedication Boston Mayor Tom Menino has shown towards the youth of this city. This organization hires young people to work as ambassadors of peace in their community. I ended up finding out that this organization has a branch in Rochester, NY that has been around for 10 years. I encourage you to look into it, and maybe even attend their celebration in May.

So much of today was about recognizing the power of youth – and recognizing the courageous work happening everyday to help young people find their way in the world. It was just so moving to learn about all of these different ways that people are empowering the youth of today and reminded me of why I wake up and go to work at City Year every morning. I’m so grateful to all of the people I interacted with today – there is a lot of work to be done, but knowing about these wonderful things in the works gives me hope.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I Bring You… My First EVER Blog Post

So today my friend Joe was able to track down my Live Journal for me (no I won’t share the link, it’s horrendous).

Picture 6But I did find my very first blog post, which was published on July 31, 2003 – which was the summer in between my sophomore and junior year of high school. (I was kind of surprised by this because I thought I started my Live Journal when I was 14 and in eighth grade, but turns out I started it when I was 16).

(That photo to the right was my user photo – well it still is, but you know what I mean).

Anyways, here it is. My very first blog post:

Well, Im having a hard time trying to figure this thing out, but hopefully Ill get the hang of it. A big thanks to Stacey for working hard and finding me a code! I feel dumb right now because I am super confused, but oh well. ::Blonde Moment:: 

Anyways, my team had a soccer game vs. Rush Henrietta, which is really pretty much Wheatland Chili. We tied 1-1. It was an exciting game, but my new cleats gave me blisters, argh! We won the league by one goal! Great job girls, Im so proud!

To set some context, the Stacey I’m referring to is Stacey Snyder, who was a year ahead of me at Kendall Jr.-Sr. High School. We’re still friends and it’s funny to think how much our lives have changed since this post. She was recently engaged and lives in a log cabin. I moved out of my parent’s log cabin and now live in Boston. Funny.

Anyways, I was hoping to find some sort of ground breaking post where I declared my excitement about having a space to share my thoughts and express myself. And how I was going to change the world with my words. Turns out, I started out being incredibly confused and well, blonde. (Both of which I still relate to – especially the blonde part).

I’ll have to remember that July 31 will be the ten year anniversary of my blogging. Maybe I’ll do something special now that I “got the hang of it.”

Watered down Bud? OH THE HUMANITY!

So I have to admit – it’s pretty damn hilarious to see Anheuser-Busch get sued for watering down their beers (including Budweiser and Michelob). I really thought that if it was watered down any more that it would be, well…. WATER.

Knowing that this comes off the tails of the announcement of Budweiser Black Crown – a pathetic attempt at creating a beer that tastes like something beer-like. (No I haven’t tried it, and no I won’t).

I know - I can't believe they lied to us either.

I know – I can’t believe they lied to us either.

I’m not really one of those people to get uppity about products. I don’t buy cage free eggs or make sure that every piece of clothing I purchase was made in America. But when it comes to beer, I have a different attitude.

Did you know that Anheuser-Busch, which merged with InBev in 2008 (which is based in Belgium – not America) controls 39% of the beer market?! 39 EFFING PERCENT!

The beer market is actually pretty fascinating. A documentary I would highly recommend you check out is called Beer Wars. You can check out the trailer here:

Piqued your interest? You can watch the rest of it fo’ free streaming on Netflix or on Hulu.

But seriously people. It’s crazy that they’re getting away with this and it’s crazy that we’re spending $22 BILLION as a nation on this garbage.

Do me a favor. Next time you’re craving a beer, try something new. Try something locally made if you can. Craft beers are called “craft” beers for a reason – making beer is an art. You don’t have to drink something that is mass produced in an assembly line fashion. Figure out what you really like in a beer, and don’t settle until you find it.

I promise – there’s the perfect beer out there waiting for you; and I’m pretty sure Anheuser-Busch doesn’t brew it.

Remember to Smile

Over the past couple weeks I’ve found myself feeling really bogged down. The whole work/school combo has been making me feel a bit overwhelmed, I have been feeling a bit homesick, and every time I turn on the news there’s more bloodshed.

It all sort of came to a head on Thursday. I was feeling frustrated about a few different things and as I was walking to class I realized wow – the negativity I was consuming myself with was really impacting my day to day life. I was being snippy in my interactions with people, avoiding social situations, and just generally feeling well, shitty.

I sat down and made myself think about what was getting to me and took ownership over it. (The first step is always admitting you have a problem, right?)

This morning as I was waiting for the 66 in Allston after a night out with friends, an older African American man approaching the bench I was seated on. I looked up and decided to smile at him. I was a bit hungover and exhausted, but that wasn’t his fault, now was it? The least I could do was offer a smile to a stranger passing by.

He stopped in front of me, grab my hand, and thanked me for smiling at him. He told me that he had just found out last night that one of his friends had died and he was feeling down about it. He smelled of booze and admitted to me that he was drunk – it was about 1:00 or so in the afternoon.

We stood there for awhile talking, with my hand in his (which if you know me, you know this is odd for me – I barely even hug my own parents) and I have to admit, it felt nice to connect with someone that way, if even for a few fleeting moments.

And to think, it all stemmed from a simple smile for a stranger who ended up really needing it.

Dating In Adulthood – Is it Reaaaally This Hopeless?

So I read an article from the New York Times today that had me hanging my head in defeat. Titled “The End of Courtship?”, this article chronicled the dating mishaps of young 20-somethings living in NYC who just so happened to work in digital marketing. (Dammit – we even had our occupations in common!)

I talked to a friend about it over lunch – I was totally bought in to the article. I actually said, “Yeah, I can totally see how the economy is a factor – I mean guys just can’t afford dates.” Thankfully, my friend told me she thought that was total bullshit and it made me return back to the drawing board with my thinking.

The part about the article that I can definitely relate to is how can millennials shift from the hook-up culture and casual relationships that we’ve become accustomed to and enter into real, healthy, long-term, serious adult relationships. And for that, I don’t have an answer. It’s definitely something I struggle with. Hell, I haven’t had a “boyfriend” since high school. And that dude  has since gone to jail and popped out a couple of kids. (I guess being single isn’t soooo bad).

Some say online dating is to blame. I’ve been a member of OkCupid since 2009 – I’m actually a site moderator now, which I was flattered yet a tad concerned with at the same time. I’ve had a few casual relationships come out of my time there – even made a few cool friends. But I never got into a real “relationship.” Not sure I blame relying on OkCupid for that (after all, it was hard to meet people when I moved around to new cities – I find it more sketchy to get picked up at a bar, but maybe that’s just me). Actually, a few of my friends have met their significant other through that exact site – and are living with their now partners!

Some say the issue is that women have become too strong. We make too much money (that certainly isn’t my problem), we’ve become too educated (they might have me there), and we are more career focused than ever before (guilty as charged). Again, I have to call bullshit. I find it hard to believe that men want to date someone they have to take complete care of financially or who can’t hold intelligent conversations – I mean I know looks go a long way, but come ON!

What’s funny to me is that people (myself included) have been inclined to talk about this like it’s some sort of epidemic. Is it really more difficult now to find yourself in a relationship than it was for the previous generation?

More importantly, why does my happiness have to hinge on finding the perfect guy? Why can’t I be content with a job I love, living in a cool city, and having a bunch of great friends? Why do I have to put pressure on myself and proclaim things like, “If I don’t have a serious boyfriend by 2014, I’m biting the bullet and joining a paid online dating site!”

The truth of the matter is – I don’t. And I believe that when I stop being so god damn anxious about the whole thing that maybe I’ll chill out enough to let things happen like they’re supposed to.

2012 Year in Review – December

Finally made it to the last post of the series! I hope you’ve enjoyed re-living 2012 with me. Personally, it was a really solid year. I felt successful in my work at City Year, made leaps forward towards finishing my Master’s degree, and made a lot of awesome memories with friends both new and old.

As I look forward to the new year, there is a lot I want to accomplish both personally and professionally. I truly believe that 2013 is going to be a formative year for me and I’m looking forward to what it will hold.

But before I get too ahead of myself, here is how I finished out 2012…

December is chock full of holiday celebrations. A tradition I have had the pleasure of becoming a part of is the PIC Party. Essentially, PIC throws a baller holiday party and we somehow get invited. I’m talking 13 different passed apps, a flatbread pizza station, and oh yeah – OPEN BAR. This party is incredible.

After the PIC Party, my roommates and I hosted our second holiday party together. This year, people actually showed up! Katrina did a great job of decorating the apartment, and they both made really awesome food/drinks. It was definitely a fun night.

Picture 9

SantaCon is quickly becoming my favorite event in Boston – surpassing St. Patrick’s Day and Halloween (which if you know me, you know I LOVE both of those holidays). I dressed up as Ralphie from A Christmas Story which I thought more people would understand, but most people thought I was Piglet (WTF) or the Easter Bunny. Thankfully, the people who got it thought it was super awesome and I was able to be condescending towards the people who just didn’t get it.

santacom

Of course December means going home for the holidays. I had a really great time spending time with both sides of my family – especially our annual Christmas Eve party that we now have at my Uncle Bob and Aunt Jen’s. It’s definitely an event that I look forward to during the holiday season!

While home, I also had the opportunity to hang out with my friends. One of the highlights was going to the Genesee Brewery with Bob and his girlfriend and then getting drinks with Joe and Kurt afterwards on Monroe ave. I’m thankful that I still have good relationships with my high school friends – they were there for me during my formative years and it is awesome to be able to go home and pick up where we left off.

Picture 7

I had an incredible New Year’s this year! I went to Chicago with a great group of people from across the City Year network. The weekend was full of laughter, brunch, pizza, dancing, and celebrating. Definitely the perfect way to bring in the New Year!

Picture 12

Other highlights included:

  • Book Club at Deluxe Cafe with co-workers – great conversations about what people love to read
  • Going out after the last class of the semester with grad school friends – The Littlest Bar is awesome and I will definitely plan a triumphant return to Dumpling Cafe
  • Finally making it to Bleacher Bar to catch a Bill’s game
  • Private Sam Adams Tour/City Year Holiday Party
  • Skipping my flight and going to Syracuse instead to hang out with Andy and Erica